Dear Readers,
I want to explain this the best I can.
THE NEW MEDICINE HAS MUTED MY INSPIRATIONAL CAPACITY.
I went to the pharmacist and explained how the medicine has effected me. She said I shouldn't be aware of changes this soon and has had the opposite effect on me than it does other people.
This is an anti-depressant that has altered my brain chemistry.
I couldn't daydream yesterday after taking just half a pill.
After I took another half pill last night I couldn't dream at all.
When I listen to music now nothing happens in my head.
When I go walking there's nothing else going on in my head.
My internal monologue has gone quiet.
I'm stopping the medicine and I hope my mind goes back to the way it was.
Depression might make me feel bad but not having my creativity is a fate worse than death.
I'm not retiring to get better...I have no other option unless my brain chemistry returns to my normal.
If it doesn't this will drive me crazy.
I am simply just here and no creative juices are flowing at all.
My mind isn't even wandering to music. I have lost who I am.
I just tried looking at uncapped pics. Nothing stirred in my mind. No stories. No attraction. Nothing.
This sucks.
Sincerely,
Gensabi
This is more than writer's block or a slump. My mind has been altered. I don't hear myself anymore. My background thoughts are silent.
ReplyDeletewell this sounds terrible hun, sorry to hear. you do what you think is best for you
ReplyDeleteAdjusting to new anit-depression medicine is a process, it's not a one size fits all process. You need to talk to your doctor and try another brand, with medicines like this it takes time and experimentation to find the right medicine and correct dosage.
ReplyDeleteI'm just going no meds. I was taking half a 50 mg pill for the first four days. That's only 25 mg per day. I did that twice.
DeleteThe pharmacist said today that it shouldn't be affecting me like this. I'm not supposed to notice changes for 4 to 6 weeks.
This was instant. First night. I can't live like this. Without my creativity then I might as well kill myself because not being depressed isn't worth it if I can't be myself.
I'm not trading creativity for a functionality that's pointless. A
Go see a Psychiatrist
DeleteThey're not in until Monday if they call me back. I'm done with meds.
Deletewell if you think thats best, but wow no creativity? that i didnt think was possible, due to medicine, but look after yourself gensabi my friend.
ReplyDeleteIt literally shut down my ability to hear my thoughts and even turned off my internal radio.
DeleteCreativity happens when the mind wanders and wonders. Creating images and stories out of things going on.
Daydreaming to music, and so on.
It took that away. I did have a dream while sleeping last night. My internal radio is back.
I still can't daydream yet. My thoughts aren't going off in my head. Walking I only focused on walking.
I've dealt with mental issues of my own, Gensabi. With all due respect, there is a very strong chance that you are being hit with a placebo effect. Your lack of creativity may be related to your expectation of an antidepressant. This isn't something to be ashamed of. It's completely natural. But I suggest you try and work through it. Maybe this medication isn't for you, but if you're imbalanced, you need to find something that does work.
ReplyDeleteTalk to a doctor.
It's not a placebo. A placebo doesn't quiet your mind.
Delete